Merriam - Webster Definition of Evolution:
- "a process of change in a certain direction : unfolding; a process of continuous change from a lower, simpler, or worse to a higher, more complex, or better state : growth
I don't know how many times I've said these exact words this last year and a half. Lately it seems like I pray, cry, sing things words more often than I thought.
To those who are dealing with life, life's little hiccups, victimized by the Boston Marathon Bombings, depression, PTSD, family struggles, war, separations, lost loved ones, health issues, stress - this song is for all of us. Let us be kind to others, and kind to ourselves. May we find strength in the Lord.
Oh the blessed TV show, The Wonder Years. Definitely the days of innocence. Sometimes I wish the simple live of being young again with no worries or outside influence had any affect on what I chose to do on my day to day basis. I knew I was safe. I knew I was loved. Now - everyday is an adventure in itself. Struggles. Choices. Faith. Work. Life.
Sometimes it's hard to move forward when stupid mistakes from the past keep getting thrown in your face. When there's no support to help you rise above where you are. When you, yourself, are holding you back. When does breathing become easier? It doesn't.
At times, we just need to hold our breath and get through the smuck and crap.
Here's to the hopes of fresh air and filled lungs of hope and joy.
I also passed my height/weight tapping with being 2% body fat under. I felt really good being able to pass everything. To be honest, I did A LOT better on the APFT than I thought I would. Especially since I ran the 2 mile run the day before and ran it in 20:19. So, to beat that time by 1 min and 21 seconds. I was ecstatic to pass my run by that much!
I realized that I felt "stuck" here in Idaho, and the truth is, "I" am the one holding myself back. And what I was holding myself back on was the height/weight and record APFT. Now that I've passed them, I feel very FREE. The only thing is - is deciding what I want to do, where I want to go and do it.
Now, to the struggles? Let's just say that everyone has struggles in their lives, and I, Super Pili, am no different. This past weekend, I was asked a few questions about deployment - blah, blah, blah, and a bunch of stuff is coming up from that. You'd think that once you've worked through emotions and issues that they would be gone, but it's not always the case. I wish there were more here in Idaho that kept me uplifted and supported. Oh well, such is my life.
And, to my battle (if you ever read this): keep your chin up. You have a lot to live for and people who love you. Stay alert, stay alive. Bac~
Next weekend is a record APFT. I've been out of the exercise loop for quite some time, so my goals are to pass with at least 60 points in each section. Sad to say, but here are the goals:
P/U: 17
S/U: 45
2 mi: 20:30
Will take another PT test in June to see if I can improve it especially on a new grading scale. =)
So... I know, it's been quite a while since I've written. To be
honest, I think I've written in my journal just as often. (Kind of sad,
yeah?)
Well, I'm still here in Idaho.
For
those of you who don't know, I came back to Idaho the last part of July
2011 due to my military responsibilities that I had the first weekend
of August. As much as I miss the islands and being with family, for some
reason unknown to me, I am still here in Idaho. Every time I try to
leave, something always keeps me here. Having said that, I posted this
little video that makes me miss home and my massage therapy sister
"Makanani".
This second video is by Anuhea. She graduated from Kamehameha Schools, the same school as me, but not sooooo many years ago. She's a talented artist. Not only that - I'm missing a friend of mine. Wishing him the best, my love, and that he comes home safely.
Going to school at Idaho State University - Idaho Falls Extension and am loving it so far. My classes are just GE, however, I love that I can relate to more of my classmates who are older, parents, working people etc.... Such is the life of a 30+ year old woman! LOL.
Anyway, I really do have a lot to write, however, I all of a sudden lost interest in typing. Ugh!
Well, when I get the chance, I'll be sure to post at least one of the pictures of a baby blessing. You see, I've been blessed to have a baby blessing... twice, in 8 days....
Last week on 26 May, I was holding my nephew at the beach. And, while I was putting sunscreen on him, he totally missed his "swimming" diaper he was wearing, and peed on my leg! Oh what joy! My sister-in-law laughed and said that I was blessed. :) My brother also laughed and said that it was the sound of the ocean that encouraged Paenoa to pee. ha ha ha
AND, tonight, I had Paenoa on my shoulders, when I smelled a dirty diaper. I asked Foeata if there was anything on my back or neck, because I felt a little "extra" warmth. She said that she couldn't see, but didn't see anything. I lifted the baby briefly and still - she saw nothing. So, Paenoa and I romped around for a little longer, and I took him down. Upon bringing the baby to the front, my eyes beheld... CRAP - oozing out the side of Paenoa's diapers. I wiped the the back of my neck and yep! Crap! On the back of my neck. (I was gagging!) I couldn't believe I had baby doo doo on my neck! I laughed so hard.
Anyway, it was a great evening... baby doo doo and all!
Let me first tell you how wonderful I think the Brown family is.
I first met the Brown family back in 2003 or so... and can I just say - they have always made me smile with their wonderful voices and talented musical abilities! They have always inspired me to seek out good music and to increase what gifts the Lord has given me... and, I found this video of Analea and pretty much put it on repeat everytime I listen to it. Her, just as talented sisters, Jasmine and Mena, are singing with her as well. 'Ofa atu.
Not only am I a fan of The Piano Guys, I am also a fan of Alex Boye went I met him and heard his music many years ago while living in California.
A funny story - I was in clinic today about to go get my first client of my shift, and this song, and this version, popped in my head. Even though I had nice music playing in my room, in my head I was jamming and massaging to Peponi!
Carter - if you're reading this - you're going to LOVE this version of Coldplay's "Paradise".
One love to all. And may there be peace and an increase of love from God and those we allow in our lives. Be well. Stay well. Go well.
I'm not sure if anyone reads this anymore. I must admit that I come on here regularly and plan to post things instead I keep staring at the blinking cursor and listening to my music.
So - what parts of me do I post and what parts do I keep within the confides of my personal solitude - to deal with, ache with, decide all on my own.
Brakes... I sprint, I run with the feel good experience, and then brakes. I slam on them, change them to make sure that the next time they are needed, they are good as new. But who does that? Who finds a good road, leading in the direction you're "supposed" to be on - not an easy road, but a good road... just to slam on the brakes because there's a more bumpier familiar road that is "short-term" easier?
God - forgive me for putting on the brakes... at least for now - until the rains, the clouds, the hail, the storm has subsided and I can breathe.
