Looking Inward

Earlier this year I had the opportunity to do an inward reflection. It was intense and I felt that my inwards were literally being shown on my outsides. The deepest thoughts, feelings, experiences - all the good, bad, rights and wrongs were vulnerably exposed. I learned that when people are ready to change we sometimes focus on who/what we want to become. I've learned personally that when change is needed, healing is also needed.

I've been blessed with the opportunity to have exactly - the chance to not only change, but to also heal. I've seen how I've allowed myself to be a "victim" to some circumstances of my childhood and even my past lives. I do not claim to have been a perfect person or to have made the best choices, and I know that I have hurt many people in the process. Sometimes it is the hind sight that I realize that it's "too late to apologize". The key thing is - what have I learned from it and what will I do with that new found information?

The biggest healing of looking inward have been that of "how I see myself" and "how I value my relationships". I learned that when I am too late in reaching out to others, I only hurt myself and that relationship. For those lost relationships I honor the path we have walked together and thank you all for loving me and lifting me and for allowing me to be apart of your lives.

I did a little ho'oponopono a while back with some circumstances and people in my life, and I can't tell you how loving and gentle the healing has been.

So, for all who are struggling with people and circumstances in your life, I invite you to join me in helping to release the people and things that are holding you back from moving forward. Let's not just push our pasts under the rug, but allowing the healing to happen, honor the past, and then let them be release to the universe for healing and transformation.

www.laughteronlineuniversity.com

Step 1: Repentance – I’M SORRY

As I mention above, you are responsible for everything in your mind, even if it seems to be “out there.” Once you realize that, it’s very natural to feel sorry. I know I sure do. If I hear of a tornado, I am so full of remorse that something in my consciousness has created that idea. I’m so very sorry that someone I know has a broken bone that I realize I have caused.

This realization can be painful, and you will likely resist accepting responsibility for the “out there” kind of problems until you start to practice this method on your more obvious “in here” problems and see results.

So choose something that you already know you’ve caused for yourself? Over-weight? Addicted to nicotine, alcohol or some other substance? Do you have anger issues? Health problems? Start there and say you’re sorry. That’s the whole step: I’M SORRY. Although I think it is more powerful if you say it more clearly: “I realize that I am responsible for the (issue) in my life and I feel terrible remorse that something in my consciousness has caused this.”

Step 2: Ask Forgiveness – PLEASE FORGIVE ME

Don’t worry about who you’re asking. Just ask! PLEASE FORGIVE ME. Say it over and over. Mean it. Remember your remorse from step 1 as you ask to be forgiven.

***I add in - "I forgive you", "I release you", "Please release me"

Step 3: Gratitude – THANK YOU

Say “THANK YOU” – again it doesn’t really matter who or what you’re thanking. Thank your body for all it does for you. Thank yourself for being the best you can be. Thank God. Thank the Universe. Thank whatever it was that just forgave you. Just keep saying THANK YOU.

Step 4: Love – I LOVE YOU

This can also be step 1. Say I LOVE YOU. Say it to your body, say it to God. Say I LOVE YOU to the air you breathe, to the house that shelters you. Say I LOVE YOU to your challenges. Say it over and over. Mean it. Feel it. There is nothing as powerful as Love.

That’s it. The whole practice in a nutshell. Simple and amazingly effective."

I hope you all enjoy the fall as we shed this layer of life and move into this next phase of loving and knowing. Look inward and love yourself from the inside out.

Love and light to all.

Beautiful Happenings

Life has been full of adventures lately and beautiful happenings.

This is my second semester teaching Reflexology at the Institute of Massage Therapy in Idaho Falls, Idaho. I've also been rewriting the course curriculum which has been an adventure in and of itself. Granted, it hasn't been the easiest to write quizzes, exams, set up learning objectives etc, but definitely a learning LESSON for me.

I have also been learning a lot about myself in the process. These past few years have been one of great awakenings and opening my heart, mind and spirit to more than I could have ever thought.

I have decided to get back into Massage Therapy and it's a wonderful and scary process. I have also decided to not just be a massage therapist, but to branch out to other healing arts and embrace what I have been studying and learning these past few years. In my process I am also at the beginning stages of moving over to Jackson, Wyoming to be closer to my man love. *Big Smiles*

Hopefully I'll be able to get my website up and have a large offering of services. I'm crossing my fingers for an easy transition and an outpouring of abundance and love.

Happy Mabon and Fall Equinox to one and all!

One love

Life is Beautiful!

I'm sure I've probably posted a title like this at some point in my online journey.

Yes, still dating the man I met a few months ago. Still living in Idaho. Still only working part-time, and loving it. Still happy with life!

Heart on my Sleeve!!!

I'm putting my heart on my sleeve and sharing it with others -

I met someone.

I have a cheesy smile while I'm typing this. He's more than I could have ever imagined for myself. I am so blessed to have him in my life. It's going to be an amazing journey with this man. I'm in total like with him! LOL.... and falling harder every time we talk.

*sigh*

Healing the Heart

I received an e-mail from a friend this past Sunday. When I first saw the person's name I got nervous but read the subject line: I'm Sorry.

Healing the heart, the full darkness of the heart, has been quite the adventure that I wish on no one and yet hope that everyone gets the chance to purge, feel and heal. To be honest, it is so overwhelming. I've been crying for days and have even had a little freak out at work. (I'm glad I didn't have any customers at that time.)

Just because some people won't be together in this lifetime doesn't mean that the time they shared was for naught.

I've learned that to love someone first and foremost, you must - MUST love yourself. Love ALL of yourself; the good, bad, rights, wrongs, light and darkness. It seems that even when I didn't love myself as much as I thought I did, I still loved others. Now, that I love myself totally, that love for others in the past has just been intensified. Almost overwhelming.

I know that one of my purposes here on Earth is to love. To receive love, to share love, to be love, to experience different kinds of love. It's always been that way since I was little. It's many of the meanings of my Hawaiian name. But I'm sure I didn't know how much loving people can not only feel amazing, wonderful, change and heal people/places/things, but also hurt. Not just hurt as in "I just fell and hurt my knee", but the soul wrenching ache.

I have been blessed to love and be in love. Each has played a significant part of my life and I no longer regret any of my experiences with them. I've learned, grown and have become better because of it. That is more than I can ever ask. I embrace those experiences like an old friend and love them like the sway of a tree being lullabied by the whispering breeze.

Thank you all for loving me and for letting me love you along our paths of life.

I love you, too.

Updating....

Just updating a few things in my life and dejunking others!!!! Man alive, does it feel good to release and let go of "things" and only keeping those things that are meaningful. I feel like I can breath easier!!!!

Here's an update on my website as well!

http://hoomaliehealing.wix.com/healing

Love you all!

And please pray for those serving overseas. Thank you!!!!

Happy 2016!!!

Hello my darling friends and family,

I want to catch up and tell you my wonderful journeying's throughout this past holiday season, but first, a quote:

"When you face pain directly she will give you an ointment so the wounds don't fester." - Ruth Gendler

For those whom this makes sense - wonderful, for those whom it does not - wonderful!

Love and light

A Long Few Weeks

Since my surgery in February, I thought I'd have a lot of down time to rest and catch up on some projects that has been in the works for quite some time.

Surgery itself was quite the adventure. I had a friend scheduled to take me to and from the hospital, however, she ended up getting really sick. So, I had to scramble 1 1/2 days prior to surgery to find a replacement. I was so grateful that I found two people to help me at the last minute. Sadly, neither of them really care for each other, but that's okay - it wasn't about making friends; I needed help.

It took a long while for me to come off of the anesthesia. Schedule for surgery at 1330, came out whenever.... but didn't leave the hospital until after 2130. I was nauseous, light headed, and kept having the bobble head affect, and I couldn't fully feel my legs underneath me. They felt really heavy.

Anyway, a friend of mine insisted I stay at her house that night. I'm glad I did. She took me home the next day - and that's when a large part of the adventure really began.

Over the next week or so, I was playing the adjusting medication game. And attempting to cook for myself was just as hilarious. You see, I practiced doing a lot of my daily things using my left arm and hand and I became a pro. HOWEVER, I didn't take into account opening a can of food, washing dishes, or putting on a seat belt would be such a pain in the behind. LOL

One reaction I had to my medicine is that I was so constipated that I was in so much pain! One night I couldn't sleep and was so uncomfortable that I was praying to die! Seriously!

Okay, well, I believe I'm done typing for now. (I started this months ago, and just finishing it today. LOL!!!)

One love

Hello ... Still in Idaho...

A friend pointed out that it's been way too long since I've written anything on here. Sad, but true.

My surgery went well. Still feeling affects from it even this late in the year. They say that it will take up to a year to get back to where I was. Not sure if that's really true, but we'll see.

Life has been quite unique since then. Definitely turned up side down. However, I am thankful for my lessons in life as it has allowed me to grow more than expected.

I'd say that nothing new has been happening, however, that would be a lie. A lot has changed and yet, I may choose not to share it on here. LOL! (Go figure, the girl who loves to write things down, doesn't feel like putting it on here. sheesh.)

In bullet form, because I do that, here's what's been going on with me in a nutshell:

- Had shoulder surgery
- Had physical therapy: Doctor had me at therapy 2 days after surgery. So weird (Yes, it sucked, but I'm thankful I went. My physical therapy crew was/is amazing!)
- Still attended drill during my healing time (That unique.)
- Gained about 33 pounds since my injury and on a NO WORK OUT profile. (It's been a pain in the behind to drop the weight, but I'm working on it! I'm down 7 pounds.)
- Spent about 2 weeks in the hospital day and night helping a friend whose husband had a heart attack and then heart surgery. I was still in my sling (for my arm) and when I had to pull him up on the bed with the bed sheet, I used my left hand and my teeth to help. I don't know how I did it to help, but it worked and SOLE is doing so much better.
- Stayed with that family for 2 additional weeks helping them with SOLE man. I can't believe how many jokes I had and that I was able to make them laugh as much as we did. "Sole in a half-shell", "Sir Cough-a-lava". Not only was this a sensitive time for this family, there were also some visitors from the other side that came to visit. "Universal tone". "Oracle".
- Went to Washington for the Faery and Human Relations Congress with a dear friend Shannon. (She is one of the most lovely people I have EVER met. Faery Congress was fantastic. Learned a lot about myself.)
- Moved out of Lewisville
- Helped to paint 2 new murals for my unit... (Okay, let's be honest - I did most of it. LMBO) Hopefully I'll be able to a picture up here soon. It was a lot of work, but fun.
- Went to California for Temana's 1st Birthday. He is such a cute little man.
- Met Triana, Enoka's fiancé. She is a hoot! I love her.
- Went to hug the Redwoods and Sequoia with Enoka and Triana. That was fun and a VEEERRRRYYYY long day! Worth it though.
- I was a Gypsy for Halloween (Samhain). It was fantastic.

I've also been doing a lot of healing. Had a lot of things from childhood and also from overseas that have been coming up for me. The detoxing of it has been quite the journey. I've been clearing out of my gallbladder and liver. Oh the emotions!

Anyway, hope you all enjoyed the nutshell.

Happy early Thanksgiving!

NCOER and a Scope....

Lots has happened since I last put any words or thoughts on here. I think a few of the highlights were:

- Visited my family in California. My family from Hawai'i came in and I got to surprise Keoki and his family. The children are so big and definitely finding their voice and expressing their likes and dislikes. Kind of weird. Lol!!!!

- I got super sick - vomiting, nausea,  headaches, fatigue..... that lasted for a few weeks.

- I took a course in Phlebotomy which was really cool. I sit for my nationals next month. (I did it as an additional tool in the event that I can't do my job as a massage therapist any more. It was HIGHLY recommended that I get a different civilian set of skills just in case massage therapy is no longer in my cards to do. Sucks)

- I've been under a lot of pressure with INCAP (which was pulled on the 13th because my doctor said I can return to duty.... He didn't specify if it was civilian or military)

- My mom was diagnosed with thyroid cancer last week when she went in for a check up. She did her first round of radiation last Saturday and was in isolation for 6 days. (Thank you everyone for your good thoughts,  positive vibes, unconditional love, and prayers.)

- Went to see the doctor yesterday.  Got a shot in my right shoulder joint to rule out the acromium-clavicular joint as an issue. Doc has better diagnosed me with biceps tendinitis and SLAP (superior labral anterior to posterior) tear. Meaning the top portion of the tissue that supports the joint in the arm ball socket - has a tear.

- This Tuesday I go to Pocatello to help the BN historian with photography stuff from deployment, fires, and annual training. It's a good thing that I have over 20 THOUSAND photos since 2010. Sad thing is, I have 20 THOUSAND photos to go through and do write ups for at least 475 of those. I think I have some write ups from deployment, so that'll lessen my writing to only about 400 write ups to do. Holy cheese and crackers! That's a lot I didn't realize! Why!!!!!!!!! Lol

- Also, my first line leader (military), FINALLY decided to do my NCOER (Non-Commissioned Officer Evaluation Report). Funny thing is - he expects me to jump through hoops to get things done that he's been dragging his feet on when I've been asking since last MAY to get my initial rating and NCOER started. What a duche bead! For those of you reading this that I deployed with.... my first line leader is L. Hansen (not eagle eye). Ugh!

Anyway, that's just a bit of what's going on with me. I'm hoping all is going well with everyone else. I'm sure I'll make some smarty pants comments on here about surgery and the recovery process.

One Love to all! Happy happy!